Gym moaners

One type of person I usually roll my eyes at while turning up the volume of my iPod at the gym is the token "gym moaner". Now you might not be familiar with who a "gym moaner" is, so I'll tell you. It's those women (sometimes men) who are lifting a set amount of weight and then they start moaning/groaning/panting or making some other form of weird noise as they lift. My opinion of these people is that they clearly just want some attention!

Hey everyone!!! 

  

Look at me lift this weight and just to be sure you're watching, I'm going to give you an audible show along with it!!! Typical Mrs. Parker type! LOL

But there's this thing where you really don't understand someone until you're faced with that same situation. I was at the gym the other day doing some pull ups. I was doing descending reps with only a 10 second rest in between basically doing a muscle failure exercise and it happened....

I did it....

I became a "gym moaner"!!!!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

How did this happen!!??

I totally didn't intend to let out a loud, I can hear myself over my iPod, MOAN!!!! 

I was definitely not looking for any attention (there was like 1 or 2 other people in the whole gym at the time), but I was definitely struggling to get through that last set and it just...HAPPENED!!!

After that experience, I vowed to never judge another "gym moaner" cause it definitely happened to me again! I became one of those people that usually get on my nerves at the gym. LOL le sigh! 

Do you have any pet peeves at the gym? 

When life doesn't go according to plan

For the past couple of days, I've been a tad restless and not really feeling at peace.  Last night I decided to pray about how I have been feeling and really lay it out there with God. I also read one of my devotionals by Joyce Meyer to try to shake the feeling. I was a tad bit behind in some of my devotionals from the month of July, so I went back in the archives to read one that I had missed.  The topic for the devotional was called "When Life Doesn't Go According to Plan".

There's a saying that goes "if you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans".  There are many scriptures that instruct us that God already has our lives planned out and all we must do is trust Him that the way things are going have already been laid out and that everything will work out in the end. 

I can't even begin to count how many times I have felt like I needed to "help God" along with speeding up things that I wanted to happen in my life. I also can't even begin to tell you how many times those things I felt like I needed to get involved in blew up in my face and turned out to be not as pleasant or wonderful as I had hoped they would be. 

Last night while reading the devotional, I decided to share a passage on Instagram and add a caption under the passage (my own two cents).  As I created the post and added my caption, I felt like what I had to say would really help someone, but I must admit, I struggled to accept and really believe wholeheartedly these things for myself and my own situations. Here is the post:

Ok let me clarify a few things. I do believe what I have written here, bu as I was hoping to help someone else, my words were ministering to me.  I believe God wants the best for me and I believe He won't withhold any good thing that He has already declared is meant for me! I do struggle with waiting patiently while I'm trusting His timing. I try very hard to be patient, but I'm oftentimes extremely anxious and want things when I want them. I guess that's human nature for a lot of us. 

I am, however, working on all of this. I try to find an opportunity to exercise my patience in any situation that I can. I was also listening to Joyce Meyer on YouTube one day and she did a sermon on patience and trusting God (right on time for me!).  In that sermon, she said "patience is not the ability to wait. It's how you act while you wait. Patience is a fruit of the spirit and it only grows and develops under trail." Whew!! Ain't that the truth!!! 

When I woke up this morning, I felt an increased sense of peace. I felt so ready to seize the day and I felt amazing! I then went on to do today's mediation with Oprah and Deepak followed by an amazing, yet strenuous workout at the local high school track! 

I think it's normal to get a little antsy with life sometimes, but it's always comforting to just stop, relax, breathe, and spend some time in fellowship with God. I feel like I'm back on track now and ready to just trust in His timing because I know deep down in my soul, I won't be disappointed!

How do you deal when life is not going the way you planned? 

Mantra Monday

I'm going to give it a try to go back to a themed day on my blog. Workout and Worship Wednesday is taking a bit of a break, but I hope to bring it back soon!

Right now, I'm motivated to do Mantra Monday because I just signed up to do the 21 day meditation challenge with Oprah Winfrey and Deepak Chopra!  If you would like to still sign up, it's not too late.  Here's the link.  

This post is actually inspired by two things I came across today.  One is from today's meditation.  Before the meditation begins, Oprah describes what we can all expect from this journey.  In that, she said "be the love you want to experience".  That statement was very powerful to me because I feel like it's so true.  You get what you put out (in some cases).  Which leads me to my next point.  I got an e-mail from a blog I follow called Marc and Angel Hack Life and they had a recent post called 6 Reasons Your Relationship is Suffering.  Here's the link to the post.  

The first point made is to let go of expectations of how someone "should be".  This got me thinking about how we should give and love without expectations.  What I mean by this is when we give, don't expect to get something back.  Give as much as you can and to a certain comfort level where you feel like you've done your part by giving, yet not to the point that you feel like you've been taken advantage of. Give and love freely regardless of what the other person is going to do.  I find that giving and loving like this is good for your own soul.  

Now I don't recommend giving and giving and giving of yourself and you feel depleted because someone or something is always making withdrawls and never making deposits. I say you have to really feel this out, but it is really rewarding to just give (time, money, etc.) freely without always expecting to receive in return. The old adage is true "it's better to give than to receive".  I never really understood or agreed with this as a child (ha...children and their egocentric ways).  But as I have matured and grown, I do enjoy and get pleasure from giving to others regardless of what I may receive in return.  Lending a helping hand, giving money to someone in need or to a worthy cause, spending time with someone who needs a pick-me-up, etc. 

I think the same goes with love. If we give the love we want to experience, yet love without expectations, then I think that could be a really awesome gift back to ourselves.  I'm up for embracing these mantras, how about you? Any thoughts?

...love is friendship set on fire...

Being Mary Jane

Last night, I got an opportunity to watch a new sitcom that BET is launching called Being Mary Jane featuring Gabrielle Union as Mary Jane Paul.  I don't have cable so when the premiere came on earlier this month, I was not able to partake in watching the show with the rest of the world (or whoever chose to watch).  My social media accounts buzzed with commentary regarding the show and discussed how they liked it or disliked it.  I saw more good commentary than bad, so I totally wanted to check this out for myself. Finally, I found a site online that had a link to watch the entire show. 

After watching, my opinion is that I liked it! I really like Gabrielle Union so that could be my first bias.  Either way, overall, I thought it was a good show and after watching some clips from what to expect when the series airs in January 2014, I was hooked! I felt like it looked like it was going to be a really good show! I am also a comments junkie who will sometimes sit and read the majority of the comments people post on these sites.  Again, the majority of the comments were positive! People expressed how much they liked the show and how they couldn't wait until it comes on again. 

Of course we all know nothing is going to get ALL stellar reviews.  There was this one review which left me basically speechless.  As much as I tried, there was no argument I could say against the comment.  Here it is below:

To All (No one in particular)

I have to disagree with this show being great. I think this show is an example of why there are so many single black women in this world. Some black women have a false hope that they deserve a baller or an elite man and have no skill, discipline, or self-respect to keep a baller. This woman is sleeping around, she makes it ok for men to show up to her home unannounced and sleep with her AND people are like oh but she has a great career. Honey!!her soul is dead and she is miserable.  Mary Jane allowed herself to be subjected to midnight dinner invites – nothing public. This woman is craving real love Her career can’t lover her, grow with her, keep her legacy alive (produce children). Mary Jane is drowning. And her own black sisters think this is great or a cute show and are looking forward to sitting back to watch this trash.

I know many of you may say “it’s just a show”, but I tell you crap like this is so relatable, because many of you woman posting – live this same life. A master’s degree or career success should not give Mary Jane a pass to be ratchet. Many don’t look down at Mary Jane, because she doesn’t have kids running around or work at the local hair store, but she is doing the same thing as Shay (Love & Hip Hop) or other girls that we turn our noses up at. But it’s ok because she is successful. Huh?

There was not 1 positive image of a black man on the show.

Lover #1 – married playing games

Lover #2 – not looking for a serious relationship. (Ex lover bouncing in and out of her life)

Father – not taking control of the family/household

Older brother – living at home with his parents, raising his kids at his parents’ house

Younger brother – no car, Mary Jane (good ole black woman has to save the day) 

Neighbor – homosexual (can’t procreate and continue black life)

No disrespect to anyone, but if you are offended than you are a part of this problem. My intentions were to make you aware “In love” – Have a great day/evening. Watch these messages people. You are being insulted right in front of you own faces and you think it’s cute.

Signed a Black Woman wanting to see her people do better.

Well damn! I mean what can you say to that!? Well actually, after reading it again, there were a few things that I felt like I could interject about, but for the most part, she has a point here.  One interjection is that I didn't get that Mary Jane feels like she deserves a "baller" or "elite" man.  I think she's just looking for love in all the wrong places.  According to a background description of the show on another site, the character Mary Jane is 40 years old. In empathizing with her, but not excusing poor decisions, I'm sure to be 40 and have yet to find love or be able to have children could make some woman feel some type of way. In fact, I'm quite sure it makes them feel some type of way. Now I'm not saying this for all women who are 40 and still single without children, I said some women.  

I do agree with the part about how women can relate to this show. You may not be able to relate to all that's going on, but there are some aspects of Mary Jane's life that you probably saw or see in your own life. Perhaps that's why it's drawing such a crowd of followers.  Like it or not Miss. Commenter, but if it's relatable, it's relatable. Should we be doing better? Heck yeah! Have we been in Mary Jane's shoes at one time or another (or some of us may still be in her shoes)...probably so! You may have been there when you were  in your 20s or 30s instead of at 40, but my take is that it's not out of the norm tor over-dramatized  Again, I'm not excusing this behavior or giving it a pass, I'm just saying it is what it is. 

After reading this comment and reflecting on my own thoughts of the show, my hope is that Mary Jane will evolve over time. I'm hoping for a "started from the bottom now we here" type of thing.  You can't go through life carrying on like you've never made a mistake! You can also learn what not to do, by watching the mistakes of others.  Maybe this commenter felt like it was making black women look bad, thus her feelings of discord for the story line. She then went on to say some pretty unnecessary things about how Gabrielle Union is basically living out her own life through this character (re: her relationship with D. Wade).  That did not strengthen her argument in my opinion.  

I do think that the commenter's hope is that we will start showing a better depiction of black people, women, families, men, etc. on television! There are so many shows out right now that basically have black people looking a ratchet mess! Where are the positive images? Shows that I grew up on like The Cosby Show, Family Matters, Fresh Prince of BelAir, Sister, Sister, Hanging with Mr. Cooper, Good Times, etc. all depicted a growing, prospering, and positive image of a black family.  We don't have many of those shows out anymore and if they have had a chance at being aired, they didn't last long (Reed Between the Lines was a good show that I liked, but it didn't last long).  I've heard these shows don't last because it's not enough "drama" in them to keep viewers attention.  

If you have seen the show, what are you thoughts on it? 

The Mrs. Carter Tour aka the highlight of my summer!!!!

Summer vacation is rapidly dwindling down for me! I have 2 weeks from today before I go back to work for the 2013-2014 school year. I must admit, I have had a phenomenal summer!

Before summer began, I was asked by coworkers "what are you doing this summer? Are you traveling anywhere?" My response was "ehh I've got a few things planned, but I'm not doing any serious traveling." I wasn't too confident that I was going to have an amazing summer, even though the events I knew I was going to attend were exciting to me. I suppose not having a vacation in another country planned kept me from fully feeling like this was going to be a summer for the proverbial "books".  

This past Saturday, I was blessed with the opportunity to travel down to Charlotte, North Carolina with my best friend Jaime to see Beyonce in concert!! Jaime convinced me back in February when the tickets went on sale that we should go. With a limited mind, I reluctantly agreed to seek out getting tickets because I was convinced that the tickets would be way too expensive, or damn near impossible to obtain.  Jaime excitedly assured me that we could get tickets and that we should totally go because this is BEYONCE!! 

At the time, I liked Beyonce and respected her as an artist, but she wasn't someone I would classify as my all time "favorite".  Now don't get me wrong, I love her music! I have always liked a plethora of her songs and she can dance her tail off!! I give her credit for that! I just was thinking, umm...I don't really care to spend a lot of money on a concert.  With enough convincing, Jaime and I purchased tickets and patiently waited until July 27th.  

After watching Beyonce's documentary on HBO Life is but a dream, I gained a higher level of respect and admiration for her.  I was even more excited now about seeing her in concert! It also helped get me revved up as other friends of mine had gone to a concert in different parts of the country during this tour and they shared their excitement and stamp of approval of a job well done! 

Jaime and I arrived in Charlotte and met my sister, Ange and her husband, Chika.  We went out to lunch when we arrived and hit the mall to get some final additions to our outfits for the show. We then headed back to the hotel to get dressed. By this time, I was bursting with excitement and couldn't wait to get to the arena! We got there a little late, so we missed the opening act, but that was alright with me. We got there just in time to find out seats and relax before Bey took the stage! 

As soon as she got on, THE CROWD WENT WILD!!!! Of course we did!!! And she put on a hell of a show!!!! She looked amazing and boy can she MOVE!!! It's a true talent to be able to sing AND dance in HIGH HEELS without sounding like you're going to pass out! In between costume changes and set changes, the audience was entertained with video clips and graphic effects. It was definitely an explosive show and I can confidently say it was the best concert I've ever been to!!! 

One of the most inspiring aspects of the concert was a video clip that was played.  I was lucky enough to find it on YouTube to share with all of you! I hope it inspires you too!! 

 

Hats off Mrs. Carter!! You did your thang girl!!!! I hope to see her again in concert!! It was definitely worth every penny!!!!!! 

Proverbs 4:23

                                                             

"Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it" -- Proverbs 4:23 [NIV]

This scripture has been surfacing in my life for the past couple of months. It's become one of my favorite scriptures and also one that I have spent great time meditating on and using as a reference in prayer.  Last night, the scripture appeared on an Instagram post that I reposted from another user, then it happened to be in a book that I was reading before bed. I figured it was confirmation that God wanted my attention and focus on it even more so I decided to blog about it.

Although it's become a favorite, I must admit I haven't always been 100% sure what it really meant. Like what does it really mean to guard your heart? And who/what are you guarding it from!? When I think of guard, naturally, I think of this....

meet the token "guard dog" LOL

And then I've considered that maybe a guarded heart looks a little bit like this...

But then I thought about where this scripture is coming from and it's from God. None of these images reflect God in my opinion. Being calloused and vicious or keeping your heart protected by something so that it's almost impossible to let anything or anyone in can't be what this is all about. 

The last piece of the scripture says "...for everything you do flows from it".  How true is this!? The heart is such a tender yet amazing organ. Without it, we clearly are dead from an anatomical point of view. But from a emotional side, how we feel, what we do, our motives, etc. all come from our heart as well. 

A friend of mine shared this blog post that another blogger wrote on the topic. After reading her point of view, I gained a different perspective.  I had never thought about it like this. She basically relates guarding your heart from Satan.  To keep him from getting into your heart by using people, emotions, and situations to gain access. I like this perspective that we must guard ourselves from tricky Satan.  

I admit that ever since the first time I saw this scripture, I thought about guarding your heart in a romantic relationship (there goes the lover in me).  Then as I continued to see the scripture used in different contexts, I realized that it's not just in romantic relationships, but with any relationship with others. We must take hold of our emotions, gain control, and be very careful yet prayerful especially when emotions are high.  

Be open, but be smart when you're dealing with others. Mainly, I took it to mean that I should stay connected to God and look to Him to guide and lead me in every situation. Ask Him for His help before you take matters into your own hands and act out of emotion or impulsively.  I think we've all acted out of emotion and later regretted our emotional decision once we had a chance to calm down or get back to a neutral state of mind.  

And speaking of your mind, these other translations of the verse translate directly to pertaining to the mind. The Common English Bible (CEB) translation says "more than anything you guard, protect your mind, for life flows from it" . And finally The Good News Translation (GNT) says "be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts".  Sometimes our thoughts can run wild and it almost feels as if we can't control the things that come into our mind. I know I have struggled with my thoughts and had to quickly try to turn negative thoughts into more positive ones.

Be careful what you're putting into your mind.  Fill your mind with things that encourage you instead of discourage you. Be careful who you take advice from and who you share things with. It's so natural for us to turn to friends, family, coworkers, acquaintances, etc. when we're going through things especially if we think they will understand what we're going through because they have once been there.  Turning to God is really all we need! His advice is what's best for our lives!  With Him, we can't go wrong! 

What does this scripture mean to you? 

Meet the Browns!!!

This past weekend, I witnessed one of my best friends get married!!! Here we have Mr. and  Mrs. James Howard Brown!!! Ok so where to start to describe how amazing this day was!! 

Let me first start by saying the reception was LIKE THAT!!! We had such a great time!! Good music, great food, and everyone danced the night away!! The DJ had to announce that the last song was being played to inform everyone that the party was over *tear*. It was so sad to see it come to an end! 

The ceremony was absolutely gorgeous as well! Valena and JB got married at St Peter Baptist Church in Glen Allen, VA.  Reception was at the Cultural Arts Center in Glen Allen, VA.  Of course, I teared up throughout the ceremony, but I am proud to say I didn't actually cry!! Just a little misty eyed action.  There were a few things that happened during the ceremony that had me laughing inside which kept it light for me! I usually am a true water works at weddings, but I've gotten better over the years. Probably because I've gone to so many weddings! I think this was wedding number 17 or 18 for me!

Everything came together so nicely and definitely was worth all the stress that goes into planning a wedding!! I'm so happy for Val because she certainly deserves happiness and true love!!! I wish them many many blessings and years of marital bliss!! 

                          

Here's a picture of Valena's grandmother getting down on the dance floor! She's 91 years YOUNG!! I love grandmother!! She's always the life of the party! Photograph taken by Derrel Todd.

                                 

A little photo booth fun with me and the girls! I love photo booths at weddings! It's so fun and I love the feeling of nostalgia I get after getting the strip of pics that prints out when you step out of the booth.

Kia and I in the limo heading to the wedding

Congrats again to the Browns!!!! God bless!!! :)